Kiralık büyükbabalar-Yaşlanan erkekler bakıcı olursa

Biyolojik aileleri dışında bakım işi yapan 50 yaşın üzerindeki erkekler, örneğin “kiralık büyükbabalar” programları, aynı bu konuyla ilgili araştırma projeleri gibi, enderdir. Ancak yakın zamanda, kiralık büyükbabalar, bakım krizi ve demografik değişikliklerin etkisi gibi toplumsal problemlerin üstesinden gelmek için potansiyel bir çözüm olarak, politikanın ve medyanın dikkatini çekti. Yaşlanan erkekleri “kiralık büyükbaba” olmaya iten nedir ve bu bakım pratiği nasıl deneyimlenir? Çalışmamızda, bu konunun toplumsal implikasyonlarına odaklanarak, bu ve benzeri sorulara cevap aradık. Bu çalışmanın teorik çerçevesi, (hegemonik) erkeklik, bakım ve büyükbabalık çalışmalarına konu olan yaş unsuru ile yaşlanan erkekler üzerine yürütülen tartışmaların, bakım krizinin ve sosyo-politik bir kavram olan aktif yaşlanmanın kesişimi ile oluşmuştur. Söyleme yerleşik olan “kaybedenin olmadığı” inancıyla uyumlu olarak, yaşça büyük vatandaşlar, kendileri ve diğerlerine sosyal fayda sağlamak için, bilhassa kendi yaşlanma süreçlerini zenginleştirmek adına, hayat tarzlarını ve aktivitelerini değiştirmeleri için cesaretlendirilmektedir. Ampirik çalışma bir Almanya federal eyaletinde gerçekleştirilmiştir. Kiralık büyükbabaların motivasyonunda görünür olan, mevcut bakım krizinin farkında olmalarıdır. İkinci bir motivasyon ise, kendi geçmişlerinde, kariyer odaklı geçim sağlayıcılar olarak, bazı fırsatları kaçırmış oldukları hissidir. Kiralık büyükbabalık, çocuk bakımına aktif katılım için ikinci bir şans olarak görülmektedir. Bakım pratikleri biyolojik büyükbabalık ile benzer olduğu halde, görüşmeciler müsait zamanları konusunda bireysel haklarından feragat etmemektedir. Dahası, görülüyor ki, bakım işi, aktif yaşlanmanın vaatlerine ters düşecek şekilde, zahmetsiz olmaktan uzaktır ve kişiyi aynı anda hem genç hem de yaşlı yapabilir. Büyükbabaların çoğunlukla dışarıda yürütülen, tipik olarak erkek bakım aktivitelerini tercih etmeleri de gösterir ki toplumsal cinsiyete dayalı geleneksel işbölümü kalıpları bakım pratiğinde de süreklilik göstermektedir. Yine de, büyükbabalar tarafından üstlenilen bakım işi, duygusallığın ve şefkatin ifade edilmesine yardımcıdır ve bu nedenle de erkeklik ve bakımın uzlaşması üzerine ipuçları sağlamaktadır.

Anahtar Kelimeler:

Kiralık büyükbaba, aktif yaşlanma, bakım krizi, hegemonik erkeklik, bakıcı erkeklikler

Grandfathers For Rent – If Aging Men Care

Men over 50 years of age who perform care work outside the biological family, e.g. in “grandfathers for rent” programs, are rare, as are research projects dealing with this phenomenon. Recently, however, grandfathers for rent have attracted the attention of politics and media as a potential solution to overcome societal challenges, such as the care crisis, and the effects of demographic changes. What motivates aging men to become a grandfather for rent and how is the care practice experienced? With our study we strived to answer these and other questions, all the while retaining a focus on the social implications of this phenomenon. The theoretical framework for the study is found in the intersection of (hegemonic) masculinity, care and age which relies on grandfather studies, the debate on caring masculinities, on the care crisis, and the social-political concept of active aging. In keeping with the win-win credo of the discourse, senior citizens are thus encouraged to modify their lifestyle and activities in order to provide social benefits for others as well as for themselves, supposedly enriching their own aging process. The empirical study was conducted in a German federal state. In terms of the motivations of grandfathers for rent, it becomes apparent that they are aware of the current care crisis. A second motive, however, is a feeling of missed opportunities during their previous life course as career-focused breadwinners. Grandfatherhood for rent is perceived as a second chance of active participation in childcare. Although their care practice is similar to that of biological grandparenthood, the interviewees do not relinquish individual claims on their available time. Furthermore, and somewhat contrary to the promise of active aging, it becomes apparent that the care work is far from effortless – and can make you both young and old at the same time. Patterns of traditional division of labor among gender groups are persistent within their care practice, as can be seen in grandfathers preferably taking on typically male care activities - often outdoor. Nevertheless, the care work provided by grandfathers for rent does help articulate emotionality and affection and therefore gives hints to reconciliation of masculinity and care.

Keywords:

Rent a grandfather, active aging, care crisis, hegemonic masculinity, caring masculinities,

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